Child won't eat vegetables? What works, and what backfires

If your child won't eat vegetables, you are in very good company: the shak pushed to the side of the plate, the carrot fished out of the dal, the lau curry refused before it is even tasted. Many children go through this for years, and most slowly eat more vegetables as they grow, especially when meals stay calm.

This page is about vegetables only: why children refuse them, what to do at the table, Bangladeshi dishes many children like, cooking together and the bazar trip, what backfires, a 7-day plan and when to worry. If your child refuses most foods, not just vegetables, start with what to do with a picky eater.

Child won't eat vegetables? Why it happens

Kids who hate vegetables are usually not being difficult. Vegetables are one of the hardest foods for young children to like, mostly for reasons of taste and age:

• Bitter tastes: many vegetables, especially leafy greens such as shak, taste more bitter to children than to adults. This often eases with age.
• Texture: stringy, slimy or mixed textures, such as hard pieces in a soft curry, are harder to accept than smooth or crunchy ones.
• Wariness of new foods: a normal stage, often strongest between about 2 and 6.
• Too few meetings: children tend to like what they have seen, smelled and tasted many times. A vegetable that appears once a month stays a stranger.
• Pressure: the more a child is pushed to eat greens, the more they become the enemy.
• Full already: milk, biscuits, chips or juice between meals leave little hunger for vegetables.

How to get kids to eat vegetables: small tastes, many times

Children usually learn to like vegetables slowly, by meeting them again and again without pressure. Many need 10 or more tastes, over weeks, before a vegetable feels safe, and each calm meeting counts, even one that ends with the piece left on the plate.

1. 1Put a small amount on the plate, a spoonful or two pieces, next to a food your child already eats, such as rice, roti or egg.
2. 2Say nothing about it, or one neutral line: 'That's lau. It's soft.'
3. 3Eat the same vegetable yourself and enjoy it, without asking your child to copy you.
4. 4Let your child touch, smell or lick it, or spit it into a napkin; each of these is a step.
5. 5Serve it again a few days later, the same way or a new way: boiled, mashed, in dal, in a bhaji.
6. 6End the meal when your child is full, eaten or not, with no replacement snack straight after.
7. 7Notice courage, not quantity: 'You tried something new today.'

Vegetables for picky eaters: Bangladeshi dishes many children like

If your child won't eat vegetables, start with mild, soft or slightly sweet ones; strong greens usually come last. Take your child's portion out before the chilli goes in, and keep salt low.

• Vegetable khichuri: rice, dal and soft vegetables in one pot. Mixing vegetables into khichuri this way is visible and honest, not hiding.
• Bhorta: mashed potato, pumpkin, brinjal or beans with a little mustard oil and salt, chilli left out. Smooth bhorta suits many children who dislike lumps.
• Rolls and parathas: a roti rolled around egg and vegetable bhaji, or a paratha with grated vegetables in the dough.
• Homemade pakora, beguni or a vegetable cutlet: fried, so keep them for weekends or iftar, but they can be a friendly first meeting with a vegetable.

For children under about 5, cook vegetables soft or grate them: hard raw pieces such as carrot sticks are a choking risk, and small tomatoes need cutting lengthways into quarters. For more meals for ages 1–3, see toddler meal ideas; for a balanced plate at each age, see food and nutrition for children.

Make vegetables appealing to kids: cooking together and the bazar trip

Children are more likely to try food they helped choose or cook. Small jobs, matched to age, turn a vegetable from a stranger into something they know:

• 2–4 years: wash vegetables in a basin, tear shak leaves, drop peas into a bowl, mix cold ingredients in a bowl.
• 5–7 years: shell peas, pick shak from the stems with a grandparent, use a peeler, mash a bhorta, carry the vegetable dish to the table.
• 8–10 years: crack eggs for a vegetable omelette, chop soft vegetables with a child-safe knife and an adult beside them, choose and help cook one simple dish a week.

Stay right beside a child doing any kitchen job. Keep young children well away from the hot stove, hot oil and sharp knives; older children use them only with an adult right beside them.

The bazar trip

Take your child to the bazar, or to the vegetable van at the gate, and let them choose one vegetable for the week. Talk about colours and shapes, let them hold it and hand over the money, then cook it together that day. A tub of lal shak or coriander on a sunny windowsill, or on the roof with an adult, lets children watch food grow.

Hiding vegetables in food, bribes and force: what backfires?

When a child won't eat vegetables, some common tricks get a few in today but make tomorrow's meal harder:

• Sweets as a prize: 'Eat your shak and you get chocolate' teaches that vegetables are a chore and sweets the reward. Many children then want the sweet more and the vegetable less.
• Force and pressure: holding a child still, 'one more bite' battles or keeping them at the table until the plate is clean tend to make vegetables the enemy, and pushing food into a crying child's mouth can make them choke.
• Hiding as the only plan: blending vegetables into dal or roti dough is fine as an extra. But if vegetables are only ever hidden, your child never learns to like them, and finding out can make them distrust all food. Keep a visible piece on the plate too.
• Threats and comparisons: 'No cartoon until you finish' or 'Your cousin eats everything' turn dinner into a fight and can make a child feel bad about eating.
• A separate meal every time: cooking something else whenever vegetables are refused teaches that refusing works. Serve family food with one safe food instead.
• The phone at the table: a cartoon gets food in, but children stop noticing taste and fullness; see how to stop feeding with the phone.

In a Bangladeshi home: grandparents, house help and 'only rice and egg'

• Only rice, egg and potato: many children live on these for a while. Use them as a bridge: egg with lau or papaya bhaji, a vegetable omelette, potato with cauliflower or peas, then a little less potato each week.
• Grandparents: a grandmother who says 'he doesn't like vegetables, don't give him any' means well. Ask for a small piece on the plate at every meal, without coaxing, and invite her to pick shak with your child.
• House help who cooks: share the plan with your গৃহকর্মী: the child's portion before the chilli, one vegetable cooked soft, and no forcing or sweets as a prize.
• Tonics and syrups: relatives may suggest a vitamin syrup instead of vegetables. Give none unless a doctor prescribes it after checking your child.
• The tiffin: a roti roll with vegetable bhaji, or cucumber pieces for an older child; lunch ideas for kids has more.
• Winter vegetables: the cool months fill every bazar with cauliflower, beans, peas, tomatoes and carrots, a good season to try something new.

A 7-day plan to help your child eat more vegetables

When a child won't eat vegetables, progress often starts with looking and touching, long before eating. Each day, note what your child did with the week's vegetable: looked, touched, licked, tasted or ate.

1. 1Day 1: Notice. Write down which vegetables your child ate, touched or refused, and what they ate and drank between meals.
2. 2Day 2: Choose one 'learning vegetable', such as pumpkin or lau, and serve two pieces next to a safe food, without comment.
3. 3Day 3: Take your child to the bazar or the vegetable van to choose a vegetable, and let them wash it.
4. 4Day 4: Cook it together in a dish your child already likes: khichuri, bhaji or an omelette.
5. 5Day 5: Serve the learning vegetable in a new form: in a bhorta, in dal, or as soft sticks.
6. 6Day 6: Eat vegetables yourself at every family meal, and talk about taste and colour, not your child's plate.
7. 7Day 7: Look back: did your child look, touch, lick or taste more than on Day 1? Count those steps, keep going, and add a second vegetable next week.

When to worry if your child won't eat vegetables

Refusing vegetables on its own is rarely a medical problem, especially if your child eats some fruit, grows steadily and has energy to play. Talk to your child's doctor if:

If your child won't eat vegetables, small steps are easy to miss from one meal to the next. ParentMind helps you note what happens each day, see patterns and get guidance. See how ParentMind works.